President Bug
9 January 2021 16:21![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
m_d_hMy sister told me that she thought I would make a good President, that when she watched Kiefer Sutherland on Designated Survivor, that she envisioned me behaving the same way. To fully understand her compliment, I guess I had to watch a bit of the show. I'm flattered that she thinks of me that way. Of course I could never be President, I'm too radical in my political ideals and my personal behaviors. But that my sister who has known me for 50 years thinks of me in this way ... aww.
I'm learning how to be more assertive on the job, as time goes by and people look to me as their manager or reviewer or expert. Yesterday I had to say something assertive, and I'm still feeling some emotional cost for it today. I don't know that I have the kind of guts that my sister thinks I have, heh. But I can pretend. I can fake it until I make it.
The last show I watched him in was 24, which was pretty well done, although it frayed a bit in later seasons. I don't know how long I'll stick with this show. It was more to see what my sister was talking about, but the show pulls at my emotions and I'm trying to let more things pull at my emotions.
I think what scared me most about my Wild Week all those years ago, and in my PTSD moments afterward, was my emotions. Why am I scared of my emotions? I remember when I was angry about something once, I mean very angry, angry for days about something, and I was worried that I was broken, that I'd remain angry like that forever, with my broken emotional clock stuck at angry. Well, I had reason to feel angry, and I'd been bottling it up for so long that once it started flowing it took a few days to finish. I'd like to get rid of the bottles and just feel.
I'm learning how to be more assertive on the job, as time goes by and people look to me as their manager or reviewer or expert. Yesterday I had to say something assertive, and I'm still feeling some emotional cost for it today. I don't know that I have the kind of guts that my sister thinks I have, heh. But I can pretend. I can fake it until I make it.
The last show I watched him in was 24, which was pretty well done, although it frayed a bit in later seasons. I don't know how long I'll stick with this show. It was more to see what my sister was talking about, but the show pulls at my emotions and I'm trying to let more things pull at my emotions.
I think what scared me most about my Wild Week all those years ago, and in my PTSD moments afterward, was my emotions. Why am I scared of my emotions? I remember when I was angry about something once, I mean very angry, angry for days about something, and I was worried that I was broken, that I'd remain angry like that forever, with my broken emotional clock stuck at angry. Well, I had reason to feel angry, and I'd been bottling it up for so long that once it started flowing it took a few days to finish. I'd like to get rid of the bottles and just feel.